Chris Rock

I missed my chance to get these clips uploaded last week before things got crazy. I thought it might be nice to have something funny to listen to while making it through familial torture. The logic still applies, but this time it's something funny to listen to while trying to forget the torture.

I consider these to be the three funniest things Chris Rock has ever said. Even if you don't like Chris Rock, at least give him a chance, especially that first clip which is pure genius no matter how many times i listen to it. The No Sex clip is one of the oldest mp3s on my computer and i can still recite most of it word for word.


You never what's gonna happen tomorrow, when you're in a bad relationship. You never know when you're gonna walk through the door and go "hey! you gave me crabs!!" That's exciting! I wonder what tomorrow's gonna bring?

Marriage ~11mb

No matter what a stripper tells you, there's no sex in the champagne room. None. Oh, there's champagne in the champagne room, but you don't want champagne. You want sex. And there's no sex in the champagne room.

No Sex (in the Champagne Room) ~6mb

Niggers always want some credit for shit they're supposed to do. A nigger will brag about some shit a normal man just does. A nigger will say some shit like...
"I take care of my kids..."
You're supposed to take care of your kids, you dumb mother fucker! What you bragging about?!? What kind of ignorant shit is that?
"I ain't never been to jail."
What you want, a cookie?!? You're not supposed to go to jail, you low-expectation-having mother fucker!

Niggers vs. Black People ~8mb

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